Note: This will be all of this story that I'm posting here. I hope to get some suggestions on how I might improve the story before I actually write anything, so that I can set it all out in my mind and don't lose the threads. I *will* be looking for a specific beta reader. What I'll be looking for in that person is someone who'll point out inconsistencies, lost plot threads, clunky non-sequiturs, peices that don't quite seem to fit, and inappropriate use of language.
Thank you.
Title: The Neptune Colony
Author: Naeryn
Summary: Some sort of asinine mix between Pern, Obernewtyn, and Titan A.E.
PROLOGUE
Earth has been destroyed and a new era begun. Five ships escaped before the sun went supernova in a fierce blaze, taking with it the entire solar system. With enough fuel to last them twenty five years, all the refugees of the old earth were put into stasis freezing chambers. The ships’ captains were led by tried and true leaders, heroes of the Ging Xai war – where China led Earth to the annihilation of the hostile Juvelks. Among them, Admiral Ging Xai himself, Captain Lisa MacViyen, Captain John Kells, Captain Frank Eyrie, and the knighted Captain Ellis McGowan. At the end of their journey, when it seemed they must perish in the far depths of space, Admiral Ging Xai led his Captains to Beta, a new solar system that would be suitable, save for one thing.
The only planet the correct distance from the star was covered water, ten hundred miles deep.
Regardless of that fact, the ships were forced to land. Knowing they would be unable to take off again, much less travel, they began to dismantle what parts they could, constructing large, platform boats out of the remnants of the ships. Much of the DNA they carried with them – enough for two of every animal known to man – could not be used. Despite unusual effects the new environment seemed to be having on them, they released what sea life they could. They called their new home the Neptune colony.
In this year, the year seven, after earth, the Neptune colony of refugees is thriving, despite the harsh laws pervaded by the Council, and enforced by the brutal Shields. The Council – made up of the five captains who had led the people to this new world, decided what would be good for the people – and brooked no opposition. To talk of old Earth was sedition, to wish for another was worthy of a public burning. The only way to purge the filth of sedition, they said.
There was, on a small ship just off Starboard of New Tokyo, a small rebellion clan – one of many. They had discovered what influence the environment had on the DNA strands carried from earth. They forged a mental link, a symbiosis, with dolphins, at the dolphin’s birth. After this event, they could communicate sights, sounds, thoughts, emotions, and any sense they came across. In this clan were Buffy Summers, fifteen at the time of destruction, twenty two now, and her bonded partner, Morrigan; Anya Jenkins, twenty five, and the dolphin Azteca; Alexander Harris, called Xander, twenty one, and Firedrake; Willow Rosenberg, twenty one, and Tara; Faith Lehane, nineteen, and Kamika; Rupert Giles, the patriarch, with Silico, and Joyce Summers, Buffy’s mother and matriarch of the clan, with Alayri.
Unsatisfied with the conditions of life under the rule of the Council and the Shield Organization – the brutal police whom incarcerated any seen to show even so much as mild discontent or unhappiness – this clan – the White Hat clan – gathered together what materials they could to construct their own rocketsleds, similar to those used by the Shields. Harnessing their dolphins to the front, they flew through sea and sky on their raids, carefully calculated to weaken the strong, razor-sharp front of the Council.
