Helen - Yes, you are right about the two girls’ reactions. Willow was just “inside” but Tara doesn’t know her well enough to know that. I agree that it doesn’t make the two Taras more similar but I think it does muddy the distinction a bit…if that makes sense. I also think it’s important that they sleep together, particularly because I don’t think it’s possible to distinguish who is holding/comforting who. And maybe that doesn’t matter…
numbered words - Isn’t it amazing how we are so attached to our technology that a visit to someone else makes us crazy? My in-laws have dial-up (gulp) and not very consistent at that and I’m like, “how do they survive?” But I’m glad you’re back and getting caught up.
Your opinion about Willow taking Tara with her or staying is pretty consistent with everyone else’s but thanks for weighing in. I’m glad you liked and appreciated the artwork and it’s intensity and subject. It was certainly a shock which is how I meant it. Tee hee for fulfilling your withdrawal.
Karm - Welcome. It’s great to have a new reader and commenting just makes me jump up and down which I would do with an ez-code if I wasn’t posting this in HTML. You are exactly right that Tara is too smart to go to A&M. I mean geez, the corps and that maroon… Yick. The Dixie Chicken? Talk about hicks! I’m glad you like the inside southern jokes. Welcome and thanks for all your comments. Keep them coming.
Mary - I’ve so missed you intelligent conversation. Sorry about the computer difficulties.
I always find the act of writing a letter to be extremely important in thinking through stuff. And as you say, even if it will never be sent. You are right too about the enormity of Willow’s effort. It was insane and desperate to even make this attempt. I like the term of a demonic transaction. Cool.
Getting sidetracked about Jodie Foster again? Gosh if she was just family… I can see what you mean about the paintings all being sold. Perhaps not that realistic, on the other hand Austin doesn’t seem to be feeling the economic downturn that hard. Lots of Hummers and new Suburbans on the streets. But I’m glad you liked the emotion of the part.
That’s a cool idea: that they are kind of playing connect the dots. Each of them has very much more to learn about the other. The irony is that Willow believed that she knew so much about Tara because of her Tara but now it turns out that she knows very little. While Tara knew nothing about the real Willow but it turns out has a connection for the last four years and has been watching her life. Kind of a switch.
The heat is better, but I’m in Austin, not Dallas (most of the time). We had a big storm two days ago which really helped. Just walked outside and it was 68—felt wonderful. I’m sure the 105 will come back and we’ll melt again. Thanks for coming and commenting with your limited computer time.
Title – Paths Diverged/Divulged Part 17 – The Unidimensional Bookend
Author – JustSkipit - Debra
Spoilers –Season 6
Rating – Part 17 – PG-13
Disclaimer – Guess what, I don’t own W&T, Buffy or the rest of the BtVS crew. Any similarity to actual persons living or dead is purely coincidental and fortunate. Also Rachel thinks I should point out that I don’t make any money from this…
Thoughts in italics
Flash backs indented
Memories and dreams indented AND italic
Notes etc. 1. - Yes, really.
2. - Baby Acupulcos is a restaurant/bar chain in Austin. It is renowned more for the quantity of alcohol than for its food.
3. - Flan is a Mexican desert. Basically it’s a short cylinder of custard, covered with a thin caramel coating and whipped cream. Sometimes it’s chocolate which is good or other flavors which tend to be pretty gross.
4. - The meaning of the title: This part is meant as a “bookend” to part 13 but it’s unidimensional rather than interdimensional.
Tara was intently studying her biology book when Michelle walked up to the table. “Hey Tare,” the younger girl greeted her.
Tara quickly packed up her books as she greeted her roommate: “hey Chelle. Where’s Eliza?”
Michelle made a disapproving face as she explained, “her father called her a little while ago. She went to meet him for dinner and will join us later if she’s done in time.”
Just then the waitress arrived with a menu for each girl and handed each a margarita. “These are from the table over there,” she indicated with her hand as she walked away.
Michelle and Tara glanced across the restaurant. “Who’s that?” Michelle asked.
“Debra and Rachel,” Tara answered exasperated. Geez, how come I’m the only one who ever recognizes them, she wondered.
“Oh,” Michelle answered somewhat cryptically, “why do you think they sent the drinks over?”
Tara shrugged her shoulders as she gave a wave to the dark-haired couple across the restaurant. “I d-don’t know. Maybe they want to get us drunk.”
“Why would they want to get us drunk?” Michelle asked.
“Maybe they think we’d be amusing drunk,” Tara reasoned.
“Then they should have waited until Eliza arrived,” Michelle joked. Under her breath she muttered as she thought about the end of the christening party: “’Willow. It’s a tree baby.’” She looked up to notice the two other women enjoying their dinner. “We should send them a drink too then,” she suggested.
Tara raised her eyebrows to look at Michelle as if she was an idiot. “Oh great idea Chelle,” she teased, “except for they don’t drink anyway and plus which Rachel’s p-p-pregnant so definitely no alcohol.”
“Well,” Michelle tried to convince Tara of the wisdom of her idea, “we could send them flan?”
“Sure,” Tara giggled, “what says thanks for trying to get us drunk like flan?” After ordering their dinner and another round of drinks she commented on Eliza’s absence: “so some quality roommate time then.”
Michelle smiled as she teased her friend: “quality roommate time huh? Gee I was at the house all evening and all night last night. I didn’t see you there though. Actually I don’t remember seeing you this morning either.”
Tara blushed red as she tried to explain, “it’s not what you think.”
“Do you want to know what I think?” Michelle continued teasing. “I think you didn’t come home because you were with Willow all night.” Although she noticed the bright red blush filling her best friend’s cheeks she still went ahead with her teasing, sticking out her tongue as she finished speaking and curling the end up and down.
Tara hid her face in her hands as she exclaimed, “and I thought it w-would be easier without Eliza here…”
Showing her excitement Michelle prompted the blonde, “so… Spill! I want details girl.”
“There’s n-n-nothing to … I mean it wasn’t … we d-didn’t…” She breathed out in exasperation as Michelle bounced on the edge of her seat.
Michelle reached forward taking Tara’s hand as she told her: “Eliza said that when she saw y’all at the coffee shop things were getting hot and heavy. Then you didn’t come home. I can add two and two sweetie.”
By this time Tara was amused by Michelle’s interest in her sex life or lack thereof . “If you’re adding two and two, today it equals five: I took her to the exhibit,” she explained.
Any observer could measure Michelle’s surprise by the look on her face. She looked like someone had just splashed ice water on her. “You took her to the exhibit?” she repeated. “But you had told her about it right?” Tara shook her head. “Oh God,” Michelle exclaimed, “why didn’t you tell her about it or take her to see it earlier Tare? How did she react? What did she say?”
Tara started to giggle as Michelle asked questions faster than she could possibly answer them. The waitress brought their dinners and asked if they needed anything before fading into the background once again. “What was I s-supposed to say Michelle?” Tara asked after taking a bite of food. “Hey Willow, I’m glad you’re here and everything. By the way, I’ve been having erotic and detailed dreams about your f-for three or four years and I put them in an exhibit for everyone to see your naked body?” she suggested.
“Ok, good point,” Michelle conceded.
Tara continued, “and then there are the other pictures.” She posited, “I could say, ‘also I have completely insane n-nightmares almost every night about monsters and death and destruction. I put that in the show too. Wanna come?’”
“What did she say when she saw the exhibit Tara?” Michelle asked gently.
Tara snorted: “shocked would be a good description. She was embarrassed but fascinated of the drawings of her and horrified of the demon ones. She actually swooned over the painting of Chestnut and Helen had to bring her a cold rag.”
“Helen,” Michelle said with obvious distaste, “I bet she was a sight.”
Tara nodded; she knew that Michelle couldn’t stand the gallery owner. Apparently Helen’s father was on some board with Eliza’s father. The woman had hit on Eliza even after meeting Michelle which had forever put her on the runner’s bad side. To make matters worse, Eliza seemed clueless that she was being hit on and attempted to set Helen up with Tara. And boy, that was a date that had gone badly. Tara remembered a few very awkward hours spent discussing art and college. When she had found out that Tara drew, Helen had insisted on seeing the girl’s work. Of course then she was offended by the drawings of Willow, who she assumed was Tara’s girlfriend. Helen had puffed that if Tara was working through a breakup or on the outs with her lover, she shouldn’t be using Helen as some stop-gap measure. With the date having gone so badly, Tara was shocked when Helen called a few weeks later inviting the girl to display some of her work. In fact the woman had apologized for her behavior and explained that she sometimes took things very personally.
“Oh yeah,” Tara agreed, “she was a s-sight.” “She rushed right over to say how glad she was to finally meet my girlfriend which I think confused Willow,” Tara continued. “Then before we l-left,” Tara told Michelle, “she said how sorry she was that the pictures were in the show and she didn’t know that Willow didn’t know about it.” Tara half-laughed: “Willow looked like she had no idea what Helen was talking about.”
Michelle laughed in response. “I bet Helen was completely confused. You should have told her that you just met Willow a few weeks ago,” she suggested. After calling over the waitress and ordering them two more margaritas Michelle asked, “so how did Willow take it?”
Tara considered for a minute. “Well,” she answered, “she was shocked of course. B-but not mad. We talked about the whole thing and it gets stranger.”
“Stranger how?” Michelle asked.
“She showed me a journal entry,” Tara explained, “her Tara dreamed about my a-accident. She had pains in her leg for weeks and dreamed that Chestnut was dead.” She continued worried that Michelle would think she was crazy, but then the girl had never judged her when Tara though she was crazy, even when Tara was most sure of it herself. “It turns out that most of what I dreamed was real. I apparently saw what her Tara saw.”
“Holy shit,” Michelle breathed.
“Pretty much,” Tara agreed as both girls took drinks of their margaritas.
“You know,” Michelle told her roommate, “this is pretty weird stuff.” Tara nodded her agreement and the runner continued, “well… I can honestly say that what I was thinking y’all did would have been more fun.”
“I’ll take your w-word for it,” Tara informed her.
Michelle spit out the drink she had just taken in shock. “What? What? What are you saying? What do you mean you’ll take my word for it?”
Tara laughed at the girl’s expression and the mess she had made by spitting out her drink as she answered, “what do you mean what do I mean?”
Michelle looked warily and narrowed her eyes, “what I was thinking would have been more fun.” She emphasized each word slowly and carefully as if speaking to a child or painting with a crayon.
Now Tara returned the tone of voice as she reiterated her earlier thoughts, “I’ll take your word for that.”
“Tara Rose Maclay,” Michelle admonished.
“Grace Michelle Stewart,” Tara returned.
“Ok,” Michelle said slowly, “I’ll ask again: what do you mean you’ll take my word for it?”
“I know; you know,” Tara teased again, “I’ve h-heard y’all enough times.” Michelle gave her a stern look that said, “tell me what’s up, now! . Tara took another drink before admitting, “I’ve n-never…”
“What do you mean?” Michelle asked again.
“Chelle,” Tara told her, “you’re sounding like a broken record.”
“Eliza and I set you up with like 25 women,” Michelle exclaimed.
“Right,” Tara agreed, “and did you notice how m-much not going on second dates with them I did?”
“Jesus God, Tara Maclay,” Michelle answered, “it’s not like you have to go on a second date with someone to have sex.”
Tara explained, “well I w-would.” She added, “plus which don’t you think I would have told you? You’re my best friend.”
Michelle waved over the waitress. “We need another two drinks and bring two shots of tequila too,” she told her. Turning back to Tara she explained, “Eliza is coming. She can drive us home. Plus which you’re virtually obligated to get drunk if you eat at Baby A’s.” She muttered under her breath: “what were Debra and Rachel doing here?” “I can’t believe this,” she said starting to talk more quickly as the alcohol really took hold, “I mean I knew you didn’t in high school but then I just assumed that sometime… I mean how could you not have? And you’re so beautiful… And Eliza is sure that anyone would die from a few months without having sex,” she giggled at the mention of Eliza’s sexual nature.
“Well,” Tara told her friend after each of them downed their shots and began on their next margaritas, “the closest I e-ever came was with this very cute runner I dated in high school.”
Michelle giggled, “yeah Eliza can’t believe you and I never slept together… and now this conversation is getting a little too surreal. So what about you and Willow? Do you want to?”
“Oh Goddess,” Tara exclaimed, “that’s the $64,000 question isn’t it? I mean sure she’s only beautiful and sexy and a great kisser and I’ve been obsessing over her for four years. What do you think?”
Michelle continued giggling as she looked toward the door. Seeing Eliza coming in she waved her over, obviously a little drunk to think that the girl would need the help finding them. Eliza made her way to the table and kissed her girlfriend surprised at the strong taste of alcohol on her breath. As she slid into the seat next to her she asked, “so what are we celebrating?”
Slurring her words slightly Michelle explained cryptically, “Tara’s virginity.”
Eliza took one look at the girls before yelling to the waitress, “I’ll have a margarita too.”
“And a shooter honey,” Michelle suggested.
“And a shooter,” Eliza agreed as she turned to Tara. “So are we drinking to your virginity’s integrity or impending demise?”
“I don’t know yet,” Tara explained just as cryptically.
“What’s not to know,” Eliza asked, “I’ve never missed mine.”
“We’ve noticed,” Michelle teased. Tara nodded emphatically. She had been thinking the same thing but hesitated just long enough to allow Michelle to speak.
Eliza leaned forward putting her index fingertips together and pursing her lips. “Tell Dr. D’Angelo your troubles Ms. Maclay,” she instructed.
“Great, we’re deciding this by c-committee,” Tara slurred, “do we want to call over the waitress too?”
Eliza looked the girl and all her piercings up and down. “Nah, she’d probably want to take it off your hands for you and I don’t think that would be the best idea,” she commented.
Tara took a deep breath, then deciding that the deep breath was unlikely to help that much she took a long drink. “Well… obviously I’m interested in … well Willow.”
“No!” Eliza gasped in mock surprise.
“Yes smart-ass,” Tara told her, “but I’m worried.”
“That’s Dr. Smart-ass to you,” Eliza teased. She was starting to move quickly through her margarita as if wanting to catch up to the other two girls.
“What’s to worry?” Michelle asked.
“Y-y-you know,” Tara said.
“Hardly,” Eliza answered, “what’s to worry?”
“Ok,” Tara explained, “well she’s like had tons of experience and years of it.”
“Oh, and you don’t so you’re thinking that she’ll be disappointed,” Eliza finally clued in.
Michelle attempted to reassure the blonde: “look when Eliza and I first made love I was really scared for the same reason but it was wonderful and perfect.” Eliza whispered something in her girlfriend’s ear and the runner turned bright red.
“Well yeah,” Tara agreed, “I get that. But this is different.”
“Different how,” Eliza asked.
Again finishing her drink and waving over the waitress Tara explained as soon as the girl had left: “not only has she had all this experience, but she’s had it with me. Or a version of me. She knows just how my b-body works and all the right things to do or say. But I don’t know anything and she’s used to a Tara who knows all her right things to do or say…”
Eliza downed her next shooter before proclaiming her verdict: “Wow that’s righteously fucked Tara.”
“Thanks for the help D-dr. D’Angelo,” Tara giggled as her shooter followed Eliza’s. Indicating the newcomer’s quickly evaporating sobriety she asked, “we thought you’d be driving us home. What are you drinking to?”
“Daddy,” Eliza informed the girls.
“Oh yeah honey,” Michelle slurred, “what did your father want to see you about?”
Michelle did an imitation of her father as she told the other girls. “And I quote, ‘3.4 is not 3.5 young lady.’”
“He wanted to talk about your summer grades?” Tara asked disbelievingly.
“Not so much talk as yell,” Eliza explained.
Michelle ran her fingers through her girlfriend’s hair as she asked, “but you’re on the board of two non-profits. You do volunteer work and founded an organization that does performances at hospitals and nursing homes. You’re busy with that stuff.”
“Well his point was that I also drink and get laid: not his exact words,” Eliza pouted. “I’ll have plenty of time to study over Christmas break though.”
“Honey?” Michelle asked suspiciously.
“We’re not going to Switzerland anymore,” she explained to her disappointed girlfriend.
“But you won’t even have any classes to study for. It’s between semesters,” Michelle pouted, matching her girlfriend.
“Well I can prep for the LSAT,” she snapped back. “Hey, let’s get out here. We can get a six-pack and take Scooby to the park. You know: beer before liquor, never sicker. Liquor before beer, never fear.” She waved down the waitress with her credit card and then turned to Tara. “You could call Willow. She’s probably just sitting in that lonely hotel room waiting to hear from you.”
“Oh yeah,” Tara answered sarcastically, “she’s just dying to talk to her d-drunk girlfriend, or whatever I am, and go to the park with the three of us to get more drunk?”
“Are you calling her?” Michelle asked as she noted Tara pulling a cell phone from her pocket.
“I’m calling a cab you goof,” Tara answered. Within minutes the three girls were on their way back to the house to pick up Scooby and get some beer for their outing.
---
"It is better to conquer yourself than to win a thousand battles. Then the victory is yours. It cannot be taken from you, not by angels or demons, heaven or hell." - The Buddha
*thinks about a funny evening with alc and dancing* jup i have to do that! 
Debra,
It was very 
! I love put you and Rachel into the fic, very cute! I can't wait to 
more and find out what happens next. I have a few guesses but I'll wait to see. Update soon, please? 
I want to know what happens the next morning after the snuggles.
verse.
Awww
That is so great ! Congratulations to the both of you
I think you'll be great parents
, and Tara's talk with Chelle, was good. It hadn't occurred to me that Tara might be a little intimidated by Willow's experience with Tara 1. Good development! I can't wait for Willow to assuage her fears.