by Naeryn » Wed Jul 06, 2005 10:16 am
Title: Adrienne
Author: Naeryn, aka Megan
Feedback: Goddess, yes!
Distribution: Tell me where and give me credit. Other than that, fill your boots. *pauses to wonder where that phrase came from*
Rating: Rated T, for Teen.
Notes: Adrienne really is cute!
-------------------
CHAPTER 4
-------------------
Tara watched Willow’s retreating back, stunned. Moments later she heard the door open and close loudly, and she dropped her head into her hands, trying desperately not to cry. She stood, wiping one shaking hand under her eyes, and reached for her daughter’s hand. “Come on, baby. Bedtime.”
Green eyes met hers as her daughter simply stared at her, obviously concerned. “Mommy? What’s wrong?”
Swooping her daughter off the toilet seat and into her arms, Tara carried her out of the bathroom and across the hallway, into her room. “It’s nothing, sweetie. I’m fine. What were you doing in the kitchen?”
“Jamie was hungry, and you and Willow were talking.”
“Oh baby… next time, come and get me, okay? Promise?”
Adrienne nodded solemnly. Tara smiled down at the little girl in her arms, who was already half asleep. She marveled at a child’s ability to be wide awake one moment and slumbering deeply the next.
She set Adrienne down on her bed. As she turned away to pull her pajamas from the small dresser, she heard a sleepy voice behind her.
“Mommy… Jamie has two daddies.”
“Yes, sweetie. Jamie has two daddies.”
“Is Willow my other mommy?”
Tara blanched. How on earth had Adrienne come to that conclusion? Pulling the dancing hippo pajamas from the drawer, she shut it behind her and turned around, going to kneel beside her daughter. “What makes you ask that?”
Adrienne quickly stripped, taking the nightclothes from her mother. “Well, Jamie has two daddies, and everyone at daycare has a mommy and a daddy. I’ve only got one, and I don’t like any of the other daddies except Jamie’s. And they’re taken. Besides, you and Willow were looking at each other funny. Kind of like after Jamie’s daddies have a fight, and they’re about to send me and Jamie over here again.” She grinned. “And Willow’s really nice.”
The strange, twisting, oddly correct logic of a four year old. She supposed that now was as good a time as any, and Tara didn’t really know how to answer that any way but with the truth. That aside, she hated lying to her daughter. “Yes, baby. She’s your other mommy. She would have been here before, but I was very silly and made some big mistakes.” She reached out and hugged Adrienne tightly. “She’s not going to be able to be a mommy for awhile. She’s going to need some time to get used to it, okay sweetie? And she’s not going to want to make you do anything you’re not comfortable with. You two need to get to know each other, but if she starts going too quickly, tell me, or even tell her. She’ll listen to you.”
Adrienne nodded solemnly. “Yes, Mommy.” She laid down and Tara pulled the blankets up, tucking them under her chin. With a smile, she gave her daughter a kiss on the forehead and stood, heading out of the room.
“Mommy?”
She turned back around. “Yes baby?”
“Tell Willow it’s okay, and I’m glad she’s my other mommy.”
Tara swallowed hard, forcing herself to nod. “All right, baby. I’ll do that. Now go to sleep, you have daycare early tomorrow.”
Adrienne grinned broadly. She liked daycare, they had toys and books and callycaters. “Yes Mommy!” she shut her eyes and willed herself to sleep, succeeding almost immediately.
Tara smiled and turned out the light, closing the door quietly behind her. With a tired sigh, she headed back downstairs. She’d watch the news for an hour or so and then head off to bed herself. She had a lot of processing to do. Why had Willow just shown up? She’d included her phone number, she couldn’t have called first? But then, what would she have done if she’d gotten a letter like that? Tara shook her head, it was just too much to think about.
She stumbled a little in the hallway at the bottom of the stairs. Tara looked down, confused, and saw a small slip of paper lying on the dark wood of the floor. Curious, she bent and picked it up, turning it over. Avalon Hotel, 2357 Shelbourne Ave., with a phone number for the front desk. The icon was a little island, surrounded by mist that faded at the edges. Tara smiled, it seemed sort of fitting.
Making a snap decision, she shuffled over to the phone and dialed the number. The receptionist picked it up almost immediately.
“Hello, Avalon Hotel, Shelley speaking. May I help you?” The woman’s voice sounded friendly, putting Tara at ease a little.
“Um, yes… could you connect me to a room? I don’t know the number, but…”
“Certainly, Miss. Last name?”
“Oh, um… Rosenberg. Willow Rosenberg.” She bit her lip, hoping that was still Willow’s last name. Was it Osbourne now? Had they gotten married? She hadn’t found out.
“Ah, yes, here it is. Miss Rosenberg, room 312. Shall I connect you?”
Tara smiled a little wistfully. “Yes, please.”
“One moment then.”
The line was quiet, humming faintly in Tara’s ear as she waited for what felt like an eternity. The connection went through with a soft click, and Willow’s voice sounded confusedly from the other end. “Uh, hello?”
“Hi, Will.”
“Tara? How did you-!”
Tara sighed. “You dropped a card in the hallway, with your hotel’s name on it.”
“Oh.” A heavy silence fell on the connection. On both ends, the women sat fidgeting, unsure what to say. “Um, did you call for a reason?” Willow kicked herself for sounding rude.
“You know, I did… but I completely forgot what it was.” Well, at least she was being honest. Willow sighed.
“Look, I have to go. It’s just, Buffy’s on the other line…”
“Oh, okay. Say hi for me.”
“Absolutely. See you tomorrow, right?”
“Yeah. Tomorrow, one o’clock.” There was a hurried click and then the buzz of the dial tone, and Willow was left holding a handset that seemed to mock her. She rolled her eyes and hit the button to reconnect to Buffy.
“Hey Buffy. I’m back.”
“Who was it?”
“Um, Tara. She says hi to everyone.”
“You gave her your number?” Buffy sounded kind of hopeful.
“No, apparently I dropped one of the hotel’s business cards in her hallway.”
“Oh. So, anyway, you told her?” Now she sounded frustrated. Willow wondered if she should have given Tara her number. Wouldn’t that have been weird though? The call was definitely awkward, to say the least.
“About Oz? Uh… sort of. I told her we weren’t really together by the end, and that he died… even how he died, and why.”
Buffy sighed audibly. “Willow. You didn’t tell her WHY you and Oz weren’t together?”
“I can’t, Buff. It’s too soon. I don’t even know if she still… it might be really weird. I’ll tell her, I will, I just… I don’t know. I think I should get to know Adrienne a little first, at least, and…”
“Will. Breathe.” Buffy marveled, Willow hadn’t babbled like that in years. Not since she’d explained to Oz exactly why things were so strained between them. After that she’d… resigned herself to it. Buffy wasn’t sure exactly what she’d resigned herself to, but she wasn’t really herself. She was subdued and quiet, and had almost completely lost that cute, almost nerdy streak that made her so very Willow. Yet here she was, pulling that part of her out again, even if just a little bit. That was it, Buffy decided. Tara needed to be back in Willow’s life.
“Right, yeah. Wow, I don’t usually do that.”
Buffy smiled. “No, you don’t. Will, you need to tell Tara about this. About everything, and I mean omit nothing, no holds barred full frontal EVERYTHING. What you’ve been through, how you’ve changed.”
“But Buffy, what if…”
“No. No what ifs, no buts, just do it. This is Tara, Will. You were too in it, you didn’t see what the rest of us did. Five years is a long time. It can also be a very short time. She’s been raising your kid, Willow. You owe this to her, because you left her with no warning, no explanation. If anything, there can’t be tension between you two for Adrienne’s sake, and if you don’t tell her, you know things are going to get a lot weirder then they could if you do.”
Willow groaned. Buffy really knew just how to get her weak spot. “All right, all right, fine. We’re going out for coffee tomorrow, I’ll tell her everything then.”
“Good girl. Now, I’ve got to go attempt to decipher Dawn’s math textbook with her. Eat something, because I know you’ll have forgotten to do that, like always, and then go to sleep!” Buffy hung up, leaving Willow rolling her eyes.
Willow sighed and heaved herself up off the bed in her hotel room and headed towards the bathroom. The room was relatively decent, dusty rose walls and a matching shade of duvet on the queen-sized bed. Mahogany desk and entertainment center on one wall with a 46” plasma-screen television. There were two bedside tables, one on each side of the head of the bed, also of mahogany. The carpet was the same dusty shade, but in blue instead of rose. The bathroom was white and bright and clean, abundant in miniscule soaps and shampoos.
Cranking on the shower, Willow tugged off her robe and hung it on the back of the door. She stared at herself in the mirror, wincing at the dark circles under her eyes and the way her hair hung, limp and dark, around her face. Before long, her image was blurred by the steam condensing on the glass, and she turned away, stepping in to the hot shower.
She dropped her head, letting loose the tears that had battled her for dominance for the past week. Since breaking down in her bedroom that day, she hadn’t let herself cry. Now, safe in the shower where no one could hear her, she could let go. It was strange, she knew no one was around out in the main room, but she couldn’t let herself cry there. Not anymore. Willow felt her knees begin to buckle and braced herself against the wall, the water pounding against her face, washing away her tears and drowning out her sobs.
Don't you sit upon the shoreline and say you're satisfied, choose to chance the rapids, and dare to dance the tides - Garth Brooks, "the River"