Yeah I am double posting... Shoot me.
What went before... Well it is all right here in the thread but in short: - This is the wish universe. Buffy never came to Sunnydale. The Master rose unopposed and Willow and Xander were vamped. In addition a wave of vampires spread out from Sunnydale. One group killed Tara's parents and brother. Tara, alone, found she could help people not to suffer that fate by using magic. She travelled the country helping with the vampire problems until eventually she arrived in Sunnydale ready to take on the Master. Her ally at the time was the Mayor who had missed his ascension due to the Master taking over. Tara always knew he was bad but he opposed vampires and until he ascended would be more helpful than harmful to Sunnydale.
Then Tara met the vampire Willow, a Willow who looked like the woman she had loved from her dreams but had not been her. They were fated to be together but not as human and vampire. Fate, being certain, gave other interested parties a way to manipulate events to their own advantage - this being Wolfram and Hart.
Faith comes to Sunnydale and becomes friends with Tara but only learns about Willow later. When she, Giles and the Council know tough decisions are made. After the Master is destroyed Faith is killed by VampWillow and Tara, torn in two, is unable to help her without killing all that is left of the woman she wants to love.
Ultimately Tara decides she cannot accept the pain the vampire Willow inflicts on people and is forced to kill her. It was never Willow but... it was as close as she had known.
However Tara finds a way, via Wolfram and Hart, to get the real, the human Willow back. Taking the recovering Willow back to the farm she grew up on the two women slowly fall in love... and return to Sunnydale.
And here we are.
Second Chronicle.
Title:
The Sidestep Chronicle – Second Chronicle - Tinkering Touch (Part 104)
Author: Katharyn Rosser
Feedback: Constructive criticism is always welcome.
katharynrosser@hotmail.com Flames just demonstrate you have a tiny mind.
Spoiler Warning: Pretty limited. The story occurs in an alternate universe as set up in “The Wish” though reference is made to events that occur in both realities. Nothing is referenced that occurs after S5 though. Guess why? Most “spoilers” would be for the first chronicle of this fic rather than the show and if you haven’t read that then much of this will make no sense but you can try and get round it by reading the preface to Part 104 which summarises most of what went before.
Distribution This story was written for Pens. Pens is its home. No archiving off Different Coloured Pens (This applies to all of the Sidestep Chronicle)
Summary: Here we are again… Setting the scene for Tara and Willow in Sunnydale. Nearly four years up time from when we last saw them… Are you sitting comfortably? Then we’ll begin…
Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the copyrights or anything else associated with BTVS. All rights lie with the production company, writers etc, etc. I am making zilch from this series of stories. You know the drill.
Rating: R – a general rating for occasional content. Individual parts might be less than this level.
Couples: Tara and Willow forever – others couples as necessary but nothing unconventional.
Notes: You really do need to have read Part 1 to 103 to get this… Hence the numbering as 104 rather than Part 1 of the sequel. There is no real recapping going on here – though things from the past are mentioned as I explain how they got to the present its mainly stuff that fills the four years in between the stories.
Thanks To: All My Brilliant Beta Readers (AMBBR) Kerry (Forrister) and Jo (Wizpup) who for some reason signed right back up for this fic after seeing the size of the last one. No accounting for madness is there. And Celia (TiredSoul) who should have known better but signed up anyway. *HUGS* and Big Thanks to all of you. This first part was one of Celia’s but Jo took a pass at it too once she remembered she had an e-mail inbox. *S* A pass that was valuable for removing horsey references – they I shied away from ‘arse’ too.
The Sidestep Chronicle – Second Chronicle
Tinkering Touch
By
Katharyn Rosser
Tara was being good; she only looked up from her books as the door to their room opened. She’d known it was Willow who was coming of course but she hadn’t let herself get too distracted… even if just knowing was enough to send a thrill through her. There were a number of different ways that she could tell; the sound of footsteps in a certain sort of shoe; the tingle that ran through her due to the close presence of someone capable of magic – magic she knew very well; the sensation of approaching wonderfulness. They’d been together for more than four years now… and Willow still sent that thrill through her whether they were together or apart. But her paper
was due tomorrow and Tara wanted to finish up with that as best she could.
It was, kind of, ready. It had been pretty much ready for over a week now, but this was an important assignment and, lacking other nearby academic deadlines, she hadn’t been able to leave this one alone. She had to admit that, for once, she was getting worried about it. She’d been looking at it for too long – that was probably what it was. It did count towards her final grades in the class, one of her core subjects, and this year was the big one for studying. And that seemed to be why she’d been forced to make a few decisions that she didn’t much like.
Like not being out with Willow tonight.
In theory all the work that she’d done here at UC Sunnydale counted the same, but psychologically it didn’t quite work that way for her. This was the year that they were going to graduate and that meant that there was no more time to pull any bad grades around or submerge them in future averages. This year had to be as good as it could be so that she could be the same. As good as she
should be.
Not that she’d actually had anything like a bad grade. Except… well in that optional math class that she’d taken – when she’d had flu during the final exam. That had pretty much sucked even if they’d taken her course work into account in mitigation of her final grade giving her solid, but unspectacular result for the course.
And the extension course in math
had been her worst grade. Logically she knew she had nothing to worry about – but logic had never been what ruled her mind. She’d always refused to let it. She’d lived her life
feeling. And she felt that following pure logic would have got her killed – or other people killed – many times over during the years before this latest, wonderful, stage of her life. But her feelings… they had never really let her down. Even when they’d seemed to lead her astray there had been… well a silver lining to whatever cloud she came across.
Willow for one.
If anyone, including herself, had looked at how she and Willow had found each other...
especially herself perhaps. Well, logic would have seen her stake the vampire Willow had been back then or to have died trying. But she’d
felt instead and now, instead of that dangerous creature, she had the Willow of her dreams – the one who’d always had a connection to her even before they’d known each other existed. The real Willow. The Willow she’d always wanted in her life. The Willow that she loved being in her life. The Willow who also shared her heart and her bed.
The Willow who is the love of my life…And here in the dorms they even shared a room. Moving the two single beds out of the room wasn’t something they thought that they could get past the occasional dorm inspections that checked for loss or damages in all of the campus student accommodation, Instead they’d moved the existing beds right up against opposite walls of the room. That way they’d been able to turn those into makeshift sofas and then bought themselves a futon. Which was great if you fell out of bed – neither of them had ever done that - but Tara couldn’t ever shake the feeling that she was practically sleeping on the floor.
Sleeping on the floor, now there was something she’d done that a lot in the past and compared to those cold, hard floors the futon was way better. Luxury. Besides, whenever she was in it… well, Willow was nearly always with her then. Unless one of the was feeling sick and oogy. And now her love was back – which meant that she was pretty much out of time for studying. It was late and Willow would want to go to bed after the hunt. Almost as much to the point so did Tara herself. She was tired and she wanted to hold the woman she loved in her arms and fall asleep with her. It was the way that they chose to round off each and every day with each other.
She sighed and looked at the screen wondering candidly, as she prepared to save the document, if she could ever really have been satisfied with this assignment - or if she had been with any of the others she’d done this year? She knew that she’d done some good essays, dissertations and assignments. She knew that she was almost as strong in her chosen areas of study as Willow was in her own fields. It was just… she knew what it was going to mean in the end – what it was all headed. And it made her nervous.
It was her future – their future. It was a part of Sunnydale’s future too. That was the goal that she’d set herself - to be a teacher here in Sunnydale - and to do justice to that ambition, as well as to her future pupil’s own ambitions, she needed to be the best that she could be.
That meant working hard.
When the results of hard work would mean so much to everyone… well she had to admit that she always had trouble letting go. She saw shades of that in Willow too, but what had happened to her love in her life had given Willow a slightly different perspective on things. Tara knew it – she treasured it too. She appreciated what Willow had taken from her experiences. She knew her own determination was mostly an asset, but when she’d first come to college it had led her to a situation where she’d focused so hard on one part of her life that the others had begun to suffer.
And sadly her life was still one in which if she suffered… so did other people. Everyone had a balance to strike when they came to college. There was the social life, the studying and for those lucky enough – and Tara considered herself to be more than just lucky – there was love as well. Watching her fellow students, Tara had seen how different people had put a different emphasis on different parts of that balancing act and how it had worked out for them.
The trouble had really been that she’d been trying to be a protector for Sunnydale as well – all through that time. Sole protector back then; and although Willow had, gradually, worked her way into helping Tara out with the role she’d assumed, it was truly no one’s responsibility but her own. She owed it to the town – a payment rendered for her mistakes. For the things she had allowed to pass…
Rupert might have disagreed with that assessment – about being sole protector. She allowed a flicker of a smile to cross her face; Willow would probably think it was for her as she came across the room to stand behind her - she’d be able to see the reflection. Well it was for Willow, smiles generally were, but it was for Rupert too. He still saw Sunnydale as his duty station, as had Larry until he’d graduated last summer and followed his chosen career path out of town. But just try stopping Rupert’s fellow ‘white-hat’ him from joining the patrols when he was back to visit though.
When Larry had left they’d had to readjust to having one less person to help with protecting the town, but Willow had, in a way, always been an extra person anyway once she started to hunt. Between the three of them - she, Rupert and Willow - they’d managed to keep a lid on things on the Hellmouth. That sounded impressive, but for a place that was supposed to threaten at least two apocalypses a year, things had been fairly low key and quiet ever since they’d come back to town.
But Tara wouldn’t ever let herself think they’d won.
Going that way led to complacency and when she cared so much about the people who were in the firing line - Willow, Rupert, Jenny and their children - it was a luxury she just couldn’t allow herself. Still, fortunately for her schoolwork, she had been convinced that she didn’t need to go out
every night. As long as they patrolled as a pair, Willow and Rupert were perfectly capable of dealing with random vampires and the lesser demons that came their way. She’d actually have backed them to deal with most of an apocalypse too and then maybe late in the event give her a call to see if she wanted to help out with it.
Apocalypses - she hoped that her lovely lady hadn’t been involved with one tonight – covering for her in the end of the world. If she’d have known – she’d have blown this assignment off. Some things were still more important. Besides, if the world ended then who was going to grade the paper anyway?
“It was a lovely night,” Willow said to her in greeting. “It would have been even better if you could have been there. Warm, just a gentle breeze, we could see the stars and everything.”
Sunnydale was so quiet most of the time that patrolling, with Willow at least, could be more like a moonlit, romantic stroll. Less so with Rupert obviously. Tara turned and tipped her head right back inviting the kiss she wanted. Willow, of course, obliged her. Willow was, as a rule, very obliging when it came to things like that. “I think maybe you’re right,” Tara admitted. “I should have been. I’m not so sure that I actually accomplished very much working on this tonight.” She gestured at the screen.
Tara didn’t have to ask if Willow was okay – she’d would have known if anything was wrong. Her love’s body language – like her body itself – was pretty much an open book to her. Willow and Rupert were both safe – nothing had happened to either of them. It would hardly have been semi-romantic stroll territory, without the romance, if anything had happened.
As for the rest, Willow knew that she had to tell her everything that had happened. If anything
had happened. And she would tell her – Willow was very good about that, keeping her up to date. But it would probably be later. When it was all quiet there really was no hurry.
Willow blessed with her with a smile. “Tinkering again, baby?” she asked and placed another kiss, this time on Tara’s forehead, before shifting to lean on the back of the chair, trying to read what was on the screen.
“Tinkering yeah,” Tara had to admit it. She hadn’t accomplished much at all in terms of actually making it any better. She’d just changed the same words and sentences that she always changed without really getting at the content or the meaning at all. As Willow constantly told her – it already was as good as it could be expected to be, which was almost true.
Willow was the one with the
wonderful grades, Tara’s were… well, they were very good. If she thought about her academic progress logically, instead of
feeling, then she knew that she’d have no problems but… there was a piece of her that couldn’t help worrying that it could all still go wrong. Pear shaped. Belly up. Kaput. But she also knew she couldn’t just trust feelings when it suited her, like avoiding worry, she had to respect them all the time. It was a matter of faith.
And so she tinkered.
Maybe something of Willow was rubbing off on her – the quest for academic perfection had always characterised the girl who’d had her life snatched away. Ira told her that all the time – and he liked how his daughter had applied and did apply herself. The woman who’d returned… well she’d continued in that same vein but with, perhaps, a slightly more relaxed viewpoint.
In between those points Willow, as a vampire, had been a soulless killer. The change after she’d returned was a subtle one. Getting an ‘A’ instead of an ‘A+’ on an assignment was slightly less important for Willow – just as long as it was still an ‘A’. At one time Tara had just found the whole thing overwhelmingly cute. Now, this year especially, Willow teased her about being more ‘Willow-esque’ than the woman herself. All Tara wanted was to do her best – she always had. Daddy had always told her to do her best or not to bother and she really did want to bother. She had to bother. Once they’d made it, graduated, well there would be some other challenge to overcome. She had to be the best that she could be – she owed her best to everyone that she’d failed in the past… When she hadn’t been able to do her best because of her confused feelings and disturbed logic…
So maybe Willow
had rubbed off on her – but that was a good thing, almost as welcome as the hands that now rubbed her aching neck. Tara’s neck always ached when she’d been sitting in front of the PC for too long and Willow knew it well. Willow knew nearly everything about her… What the owner of those tender fingers didn’t know wasn't worth mentioning.
--------------------
“So how’s that tinkering going then baby?” Willow asked the woman she loved, still looking over her shoulder at the screen. She’d known when she went out that Tara would have spent the evening tweaking the paper. Again. Willow, of all people, knew about that sort of academic desire. It was just that Tara was determined to… well not even just to
pass her course. Tara was looking way beyond that. Beyond even the teacher training she was determined to do next. All this tweaking, now and throughout the semester, was and had been about just one thing. Tara was fulfilling a promise she had made. She was tweaking this essay so she could fulfil a promise she had made to an evil man.
Which wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. A promise was a promise and even a promise to a bad man could still be a good one. Tara had been searching for some way to make up for the things that she
thought she’d done, before she’d even realised that there was much wrong with them. That was who Tara was. The woman that Willow loved couldn’t be anything but a giver. Tara always thought of the other people before herself or - at the most selfish she could manage – at the same time.
But the beautiful woman hadn’t known just what she wanted to do – not for certain – until the Mayor had crystallised the thoughts she’d already been contemplating. That was all it was. Tara had been thinking… even mentioned teaching before. But he’d just given her a tiny push. Willow would have worried if, being him, it had been anything else – or anything more. But that was all it was… just a request – and not a bad one at that.
What had began as a request on videotape had become a promise. Not really to Richard Wilkins to whom Tara really owed nothing at all, but instead to Willow and to the people of Sunnydale - whether past, present or future. In truth, Willow thought, it was also a promise Tara had made to herself. She needed something like that – a purpose that was outside and beyond the life she’d almost left behind. Almost because… Well she was here with Tara wasn’t she? And one of the last actions of Tara’s old life had been to make sure Willow had her chance at life again. One of the first actions of her baby’s new life… Well, it had made Tara her baby.
It was a good promise too. It was a way of putting into words something that Tara had been working up to ever since she’d come to Sunnydale. Tara was redrafting this paper so extraordinarily carefully, as she did most of them now, because she wanted to help people of the future – the children. It was that simple. Tara was so dedicated that she couldn’t see any difference between the preparation and the actual helping itself.
That was just who she was. It was all part of the same thing. By getting ready to help – she already was. It was an attitude which made certain everything Tara needed would come to pass.
Not that she’d ever change her baby or even want to… but sometimes Willow had to think that maybe Tara was being pulled in too many different directions by life. Once Rupert had gotten over the notion of ‘Me Watcher, You Obey’ things had got a lot better. That had been right around the time he’d become Rupert instead of Mr Giles to them, no coincidence there. To be fair, Tara’s demands upon him had been as forceful as his upon her, driven by a desire to protect the townspeople. Maybe ‘demands’ was too strong a word – they were working together and their dedication was equally matched, even if their reasons were not.
He had a family to consider, as did Jenny who had always helped with the research stuff as much as she could, as well as his work and the rest of his life. As Tara kept saying when Willow had wondered if he could take an extra hunt or something – ‘he has as many important things in his life as I do in mine.’ Tara said it most when she was trying to take some of the strain off the Giles family.
The trouble was that Tara used the same line in defence of her choice not to take a little more time for herself. Not quite a defence, but more of a reason.
There was Tara the protector.
Tara the student.
Tara – her love - and Willow liked that one most of all.
But where was just… just Tara?
She wasn’t sure the words ‘just’ and ‘Tara’ went together but it was something Willow worried about sometimes.
When was the last time that Tara had taken time out for something that wasn’t about someone else? She couldn’t find that sort of time. There were… They never had to
try to be a couple… and Willow couldn’t be happier with
them even if she’d had three wishes to make it come true. They were in love and they found as much time as they needed to be together, to show that to each other. She wasn’t sure how they ever did find all that time - so much and so little – depending on their perspective at the time.
But the rest of the time Tara was pretty much out patrolling, researching some evil, studying or being with the few friends that their lives offered time for – chiefly Jenny, Rupert, Faith and now little Ben, but there were friends from classes too and the guys and gals in the dorm. But…
Where was
Tara in that? When, for example, was the last time Tara had been riding?
Or sat and sketched something, the way she had at the farmhouse, when Willow had just watched her for hours?
Or simply sat to read a book for the sheer heck of it - without some big research purpose?
Tara was so busy trying to
build the future that she wasn't leaving much of the present just for herself. After more than four years, Willow loved her as much as she had the first time she’d known it… Back at the farm… When Tara had brought her back. Nursed her… made her a person again and then got to know her. She was probably more in love, but she knew by now that there were things that each half of a couple needed to do for themselves. Being together was wonderful, but Willow knew from her own experience that sometimes… just sometimes… you needed to slow down, take a moment for yourself, or even stop for a little while.
Take time for yourself. Ten minutes, an hour… a day.
Tara never did though. At least not just for herself. The really sad thing was Willow knew how much Tara
would like to go riding or read a book and the ‘why’ she thought that she couldn’t – no matter how much Willow tried to make the time for her. She’d helped, learned how to hunt with Tara and thought maybe that would give Tara more time to herself.
Instead, it simply made them more effective.
They were all doing research when they had to and still they didn’t find time – or at least Tara didn’t. There was always something else to find out. More to study. Something else to kill. More time to spend with Jenny and the kids. More
them. But never more for Tara – even when Willow took a few moments for herself. And it wasn’t even that Tara was unhappy. She was doing what she wanted after all and ultimately Willow had to support her in that.
She just wished that… things would be a tiny bit different.
“Not bad,” Tara told her in response to her question about the tweaking and Willow watched as she went back and altered another word. It was a ‘that.’ Sometimes Tara had a tendency to have too many ‘that’s’ in her writing. Too many by far. If you had to have a fault then that was a pretty minor one. Too many uses of ‘just’ on the other hand was a crime… ‘Just’ was Willow’s failing.
“So is it perfect yet?” Willow asked her as she kissed the top of her lover’s head again, breathing in the sweet scent of Tara’s recently washed hair. It was good to strive for perfection – Willow could appreciate that. She’d been doing it for a long time herself – barring that rude interruption when she’d been dead and all. But until the start of their senior year, seeing Tara, she’d never really appreciated how that kind of striving fro academic perfection looked to other people.
Now she’d realised how Tara must have been seeing her for the last few years… with a lot of love and the occasional amused shake of the head when things got too far out of hand. It was all in the best cause though and academic rivalry had never failed to motivate Willow when she’d been back at school. And it wasn’t like this focus on getting things just right was eating into their loving.
“I’m not trying to make it perfect,” Tara responded then looked round again. “As you well know, sweetie. I just want…” Tara paused.
Willow thought about it herself. What did Tara want? What did anyone want? It was a tough question to answer. Right now, about the essay, Willow supposed that Tara, just like she would herself, would be waiting for that moment of revelation where it would either just
be or when she had to go to bed and just leave it alone.
“You want it to be
right,” Willow suggested as she caressed Tara’s ear. She knew that feeling very well indeed, but she also knew when it was time for Tara to come away. When looking at something just didn’t help anymore it was past that time. “But baby, if it’s not now then it’s really not going to be.”
That seemed to worry Tara for a moment. “And I think it already is,” Willow added when she saw that look on her love’s face. So this was what it was like looking in a mirror? She had to smile as she gently pried Tara’s fingers from the mouse and started to shut the PC down for her. Tara didn’t help her, but she didn’t really resist either. That suggested that her love was tired and wanted an excuse to get away from the paper – an excuse that her return to their room had provided. And that, in turn, suggested Tara knew it was more than ‘okay’ already.
“Will you…” Tara started to ask.
Once again Willow had to smile. “Yes, I’ll give it one last read through in the morning. At this rate I’m going to know this subject as well as you do,” Willow teased gently.
“Knowledge acquired through love,” Tara mused as she turned on the desk chair to face Willow. “It’s not a bad thing is it?”
No. Not a bad thing. They both knew what the bad things in this world really were, and neither knowledge nor love was one of them.
“I just want… I just want to do well with this,” Tara told her.
Willow knew what she meant. They’d fought so hard for their freedom from prophecy, badness and lawyers – to be able to do this. To be able to come here without risking themselves or others. To have a future together and to be able to use that future for something that was good and wholesome. Now that they were getting there, it somehow seemed more and more important to make sure that nothing could go wrong with those dreams – and to make sure they made the most of the opportunity that had come at such a cost. She bent forward and kissed Tara on the head once more. “You have done well. You will do well… You’ll get everything you want, baby.”
“
We’ll get everything we want,” Tara responded pointedly.
“I was just checking you still wanted ‘we,’” Willow told her with a huge grin on her face. She knew. She just liked to hear it again, and again.
And again.
“Love you, sweetie,” Tara told her as she allowed Willow to step back and pull her from the chair and to her feet.
“Love you too,” Willow promised her. “Always.”
“Forever,” was Tara’s only response.
The pain in the association of those two words had long since gone away. The mere fact that they’d had meant such different things – the latter being a bad thing in that context - well now that was no longer the case. The words, both of them, seemed so much sweeter to them. It was like a victory over the bad old days every time they could show not only that they loved each other, but also how much they’d overcome to get to where they were now.
Willow started to step away from her lover, but not letting Tara fall behind. Instead she lightly held Tara’s hands in hers and as she backed away the hands and arms were a pair of bridges between them, stretching the gap to simple arms length – maintained by Tara following her.
When they reached what would have been Willow’s bed if it weren’t for the futon they’d replaced it with, Willow backed straight into it and fell as much as she sat down. A smile broke over Tara’s face at the nature of the undignified landing and Willow couldn’t help but reciprocate. She’d been lost in her lover’s blue eyes when she’d hit the edge of the bed and hadn’t been able to stop herself. She still held Tara’s hands in her own, only now she chose to let one go, the other connection seeming light and tenuous… but the reality was that it was as strong as their love – even when they weren’t actually touching. With her now-free hand, she threw aside the cushions and cleared some space for Tara to join her.
“Here?” Tara asked her, still smiling.
“Wherever you are,” Willow promised her. “But right now, you’re here… so this will do.” She shuffled back on the bed, pushed her shoes off and then swung her legs up and waited for Tara to join her. “At a pinch.”
“Wherever?”
“Whenever.”
Tara lay down beside her, so they faced each other on the narrow bed that had been made for one. Words weren’t immediately necessary. They could do this. They could just be silent with each other. Lying together on a bed and just
being with each other. Touching wasn’t necessary – though this time their fingers were alternately interlaced and then playing little games with each other. And then, eventually, they would find the perfect connection for the moment.
Sometimes that would mean snuggles and more.
Sometimes it would mean simply holding hands – perhaps as they had the very first time Willow, the other Willow, had gone to Tara. Now… even that was placed in a proper context. They’d started to find each other then even though it had taken so much longer to come together properly.
Sometimes it would be a kiss.
Sometimes it would be fingers in the other’s hair.
And this time, their perfect connection was the simple laying of a hand on the other’s waist whilst they touched each other’s faces… so gently that they might barely have been touching each other at all.
“Love.”
That was all that was necessary. Willow wasn't sure if she’d spoken or if Tara had. It really didn’t matter. There was just one love between them. They shared it just as they shared a spirit and a heart.
“Love,” Tara responded.
So it must have been she who had spoken first. Unless Tara was repeating herself. “You want to know about the hunt?” she asked Tara out of deference to her baby being tired – and no doubt wanting to get up early tomorrow for the final read through of the paper. Just one last time. Tara closed her eyes briefly as Willow asked the question.
She opened them again and said, “Please.”
Willow hadn’t missed the gesture though. It might have been that Tara regretted the question being asked at such a perfect moment, or it might have been that she just wanted something more snugglewise. Or even just a desire to get to sleep? Willow didn’t think so. She knew Tara so well now that she could read the cues that suggested when snuggles would be an attractive proposition. They were still there but there was more than…
And, anyway, Tara had told her that she always wanted to know about the patrols that she missed. That she needed to know about them so she could do what she had to do. Tara needed the information about what was going on in Sunnydale to be able to protect the town. As best she could. She’d never stopped doing that – even when she’d left town for Willow - it had also been for Sunnydale. She’d killed the last of the Master’s favourites to do that. Of course, she’d said the thing about needing to know a long time ago – back when they’d been convinced that there would be some new Uber-monster to fight in fairly short order - and instead…
Willow was firmly of the opinion that Tara, with a little help from her friends, had stopped the next big-bad, and the next, and the next, from coming to pass through her dedication and the way that she’d always cared enough to want to stop
anyone from getting hurt in Sunnydale. Some time ago, Jenny had advanced the theory that the bad guys had learned that there was something dangerous in Sunnydale… even after the Master and the Mayor had been destroyed. And that it was dangerous for them to be there.
And Tara was dangerous for them. Tara was death to them as much as she was life to Willow.
The only reason that she really
needed any help was to give her some time off from hunting. The magic that she had access to now… that they both had… neither Rupert nor Jenny had ever seen anything like it. They’d never found much beyond legends in their research either. It wasn't that it was ‘powerful’ as much as it didn’t have the dangers – exhaustion and darkness – associated with it. They could do good without worrying about being consumed by the ‘sword’ they wielded.
Tara was, almost literally, a force of nature – they both were - and dealing with everyday, or rather every-night, vampires wasn't something that taxed her very much. The vampires that were in Sunnydale now were nothing like as strong, or as organised as in the days of the Master. There was the occasional hostile demon that bothered people – but unless they actually threatened to hurt someone then Tara was willing to tolerate them – assuming that they weren’t any sort of vampire. Vampires were something Tara would never be able to tolerate.
One thing about her baby that had never changed was the intolerance of vampires. Any of them but…
They, their destruction, didn’t drive her anymore… it wasn't the foremost thing in her mind. But Tara just wouldn’t let them exist here – at least if she found them. If they hid away well enough – which really meant not feeding at all – then they could probably last a little while.
Once she would have hunted them down. Each and every night.
Sometimes Willow just felt like the rest of them - she, Rupert, Jenny and Larry - were along for the ride – but getting Tara to agree to let them risk themselves when she could risk herself alone had been an achievement in and of itself.
Rupert liked to feel that he was keeping his hand in by assisting her – and that was certainly true – but as much as anything, Willow thought that it had been his realisation that Tara wasn’t a Slayer, and didn’t need him to be a Watcher for her, which had shaped their ‘working’ relationship.
Besides, after a while Willow had also realised that her lover and the school librarian had actually become friends – which had taken her by surprise when it had happened. Indeed when she’d mentioned it to Tara, the other woman had been forced to think about it before admitting it herself. And when Willow had mentioned it to Jenny, all the teacher had been able to do was smile and say ‘You noticed that too huh?’
Tara and Rupert had reached an understanding before she and Willow had even come back to Sunnydale permanently. An understanding about what had gone before… Initially that had been demonstrated by his tolerance of the woman whom he still considered partly, partially, to blame for the death of his Slayer. The real change had come about when he had conceded that it had been his own fault as much as, if not more than, Tara’s. Willow suspected, after that, they’d found, through prolonged social exposure as well as shared dangers, that they really did like each other as well.
‘After all,’ Tara had finally said after thinking about the friendship, ‘if Jenny chose him there had to be a chance we’d get on.’ And if there was something slightly strange about two women in their early twenties, though they were starting to slip towards being officially ‘mid’, spending most of their ‘free’ time with a teacher and a librarian – and their adorable daughter – then no one had ever said so. Another child had just added to that sense of togetherness. They were, after all this, a family.
Back to the report though… “It was,” Willow said, “a big fat non-event. Except it wasn't fat. Or big. It was nothing. There was nothing. We didn’t get to kill anything.” It was strange, Willow thought, that mindset she’d gotten into that made her regret not being able to kill vampires. In her mind now, every one that she or Rupert killed was one less for Tara to worry about and one less to hurt anyone else.
“Another quiet night huh?” Tara mused, hardly even asking the question verbally.
“It bothers you?” Willow asked her gently. Too much activity or not enough - there was never a
right answer was there? It was a gut feeling that Tara had; that would be what was worrying her and Willow knew by now that it was something to which they really should be listening. Tara
felt - that was how she operated. How she stayed alive. It was how she was wired and why she was the wonderful woman she was.
“It never bothers me that you had a safe, uneventful, evening,” Tara replied choosing that moment to kiss her again.
“But the rest?” Willow pressed and not at all bothered by the interruption.
Tara nodded and was then distracted by Miss Kitty picking her own moment to leap up onto the bed that she’d claimed as her own sleeping place about an hour after she and Tara had rejected separate beds. That, in turn, had been about a minute after arriving. Miss Kitty had ‘owned’ this space for a long time then… The black and white cat sauntered up the narrow space between them, absolutely certain that if there were ever too little room then it would be her mommies that would move for her and not the reverse.
And they did move, widening the gap at their knees and feeling the soft fur caress their arms as Miss Kitty made her way past their waists and under their linked hands. Eventually she made it as far as she wanted to go, turning around a few times between them before lying down and resting her back against Tara’s chest, looking straight at Willow. To Willow’s mind there was a hint of a challenge in that look. An amused wondering whether either of them would dare to challenge her presence in the warm place between them, let alone dare to lift her out of it.
As Willow just might have done had it not been for Tara starting to stroke the cat. If Miss Kitty could have grinned at Willow she probably would have done. Not only was her place confirmed but she’d managed to get the attention that she’d wanted too.
Victory was hers.
Maybe so… but Tara was Willow’s and their cat wasn’t daft enough to doubt it after all this time.
Miss Kitty purred.
Tara carried on stroking the both of them as she finally answered Willow’s question. “I just worry when things are so quiet for so long. In one way it’s good, but… you know…”
“Where are all the vampires?” Willow finished for her.
“I have to worry about things like that,” Tara said.
Tara really did. That was who she was. She was the girl who had grown into the woman who’d taken that responsibility upon herself. Maybe it had been revenge once upon a time. But the reality today, and for a long time now, was that Tara cared about people - all people – some more than the rest perhaps… and one, Willow thought with pride, most of all.
That one person was her. Somehow… being that one person made what they had even more special. Yes, she had to share Tara’s time with killing vampires and making Sunnydale safer – but she’d chosen to be a part of that too. She helped, made it easier and safer. She’d chosen Tara and Tara had chosen her. Willow pushed her lips forward, aware of Miss Kitty who was watching the distance between them decrease, and found Tara’s lips.
“We do have to worry sometimes,” Willow said eventually, “but not right now, huh?”
“No,” Tara replied with a smile, “not right now, sweetie.”
“Can we snuggle for a while?” Willow asked. ‘Can we?’ Not a question that had ever really been answered in the negative when ‘snuggle’ could mean so many things – some of them at the same time. Tara kissed her by way of response and Miss Kitty didn’t even have to move when they got up to go to bed together and she had the bed to herself once again.
*************************
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If I want a little pussy, I got my own to play with.
Chance in
Chance.------------------------
by Cicca » Fri May 23, 2003 1:38 pm 
At last I can get at the individual chapters on that page without refreshing ten times. 
when I saw that the sequel had started I got up and did a dance of joy 
I'm looking forward to the next part
And Miss Kitty. Sigh. I'm a cat person (but uh, without the fur and whiskers) and that is just so true. Many's the time I've sat/lain beneath one of our cats - because you just are not permitted to disturb the cat.
. It's refreshing to read your unique descriptive style again, and I'm looking forward to continuing reading Second Chronicle 
.
the 
What? Ok, I'm a big girl, I can live without smut. Mush though? Need mush! Is there mush? There was already yummy mush in the first part, oh yes. 
ana