Fic: - The Sidestep Chronicle & Second Chronicle

[Katharyn]

Thanks Cicca - I guess that part worked then... suspense wise. Which is good as I do not do suspense much.



You do not have to create as a reader, I am pretty sure that is the writers job*S*



Katharyn

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[LeatherQueen]

Oh wow, Katharyn... Another delightful update from you. Tara's emotions are so raw and churned up right now. I don't think she knows whether she's coming or going.



God, I love this story. It's really one of those stories where you get totally swept up in the character's thoughts and emotions and you find yourself thinking about what they're going to do now that such and such happened. Especially at the strangest times. Like in the middle of business meetings. But, seriously, I just totally love this story. So... yay you!



And that's my little Rah Rah Katharyn cheer for the day.

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"But when they're playing your song on the jukebox in Hell, you might as well dance." - K. Simpson


"Futile... like a FOX, baby!" - Tara in The Late Shift by wiccachica

[Katharyn]

Thanks Leatherqueen... and yeah Tara is definitely raw and churned. That will take a while to settle.



And I so agree with you about being swept away... little things come to me all the time and I get home with a bag full of post it notes with scrawl on*S*



Were there pom poms with that cheer?



Katharyn

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[LeatherQueen]

Quote:

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Were there pom poms with that cheer?

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Yes. Leather ones.

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"But when they're playing your song on the jukebox in Hell, you might as well dance." - K. Simpson


"Futile... like a FOX, baby!" - Tara in The Late Shift by wiccachica

[mollyig]

Tara, having thought she would become a demon, had put off a lot of her questions and concerns. Now they've returned, and she has to find a way to reconcile who she is with working for the Mayor and who she is in love with.



She has discovered now that she has a future, and can have a future with VWillow . . . but at what cost. The guilt setting in stronger now - she contemplates not removing the pendant ever again - yikes! When she went off with that stake looking for Willow, I swear I stopped breathing for a while!



Excellent, as ever.

Adding up the total of a love that's true, multiply life by the power of two
Indigo Girls

[Tulipp]

I haven't actually read this part yet; I just printed it out to read on the bus to work this morning, but I wanted to say...



Dumb luck? Please. Who do you think you're kidding? *S*

[Tiggrscorpio]

Wow, Katharyn, this was excellent. The aspects of grey were so interesting. Tara should be relieved about being human, but it's brought up so many other conflicts and then, of course, her doubting about whether it's actually true. Her search for the truth was thrilling. Another marvelous update. Thanks!

*****

She's my everything!

[tommo]

I love the almost quiet turmoil that Tara is going through. And Willow's childlike persona again bites right through the crap and gets to the reader. The way that she turned her back on Tara spoke volumes to me, even though yes, she was ready for an attack. But it was like a little test between them. Just another little test.



Agonisingly tortorous. Thanks. Heh.

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This...won't hold me...forever...

[Tulipp]

Well, that was definitely the best bus ride I've had in awhile. Well, since the last time I printed one of your chapters, actually....



I noticed your return to the whole "copper tasting tongue" thing and was so compelled by it. The idea that Tara could have that sensation and not really know whether it's real or simply her own knowledge was really subtle and right-on. It's akin in some way to her feeling anger and not really knowing if it's her own anger or the darkness.



I found this to be a very chilling chapter, and it's one of the first times I've felt that way. I never thought that Tara would actually stake Willow, but at the same time, when her smile at Willow's whittling faded away, and when she talked about needing just the one stake, and when she and Willow were faced off.... goosebumps. Really.



Then piercing her own skin with the stake and feeling sickened...I keep feeling that you can't raise the stakes (oh, I coudn't help it) on this anymore, and then you do.

[Katharyn]

Thankyou guys, feedback whore that I am I have to respond even before making dinner*S*



Mollyig - Tara did put off a lot of stuff, and that in itself was hard for her. Good person that she is though she can't continue to do so much longer, can she?



Tiggrscorpio - Ahh the grey... one day it will be all light... maybe even in colour.



Ruth - Agonisingly tortuous? I like that...



Tulipp - We often do not know why we feel what we feel... Cos it hurts... or cos we know it should?

I also found it chilling writing it as we again get VW killing - something I have not directly shown for a while.



Thanks!



Katharyn

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Edited by: Katharyn at: 7/9/02 10:16:37 am

[Kalita]

What a fascinating little odyssey! I do get the feeling that even Tara wasn't sure what she was going to do with that stake. Is her final decision the right one? I think so, but then I'm biased.



The big question now - where to from here? There's the question of Tara's employment, among other more mundane factors. But many big decisions and, I'm sure, revelations to come.



And I have NO IDEA what's going to happen. That, I think, is the best part....

"Hot lesbian witches! It's f--king genius!"
-Charlie Sheen, Being John Malkovich

[Katharyn]

Hey Kalita, thankyou*S*



I was always sure, in my own mind, what Tara was thiniking she was going to do with the stake.



Now okay that sounds odd... of course I knew as I knew what had to happen and when - but as I have said before I am sort of channeling this stuff when I write.



I think Tara knew, though it was deliberately written (or rather redrafted) to allow the reader to not only doubt it first time through but also if you looked back later. You take from this what you find and my way is not always the right way... (or the most interesting - I am often amazed at what people find in this and point out to me. None of it is deliberate - which gets back to alot of Pure Dumb Luck.)



Mmmm where to from here? Good question... One I agonised over for a while*S* Part 60 will lay the start of the next arc out. Still alot of room for speculation, but the foundations are already there. Least I hope they are!



Katharyn

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[tommo]

Quote:

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Agonisingly tortuous? I like that...

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Heh. Thought you might.

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This...won't hold me...forever...

[VampNo12]

Another wonderful update Katharyn! One of the things that stood out to me first was Tara musing on the reasons why nothing romantic could happen between her and Lilah. Beside the simple fact she doesn't have any romantic feelings for Lilah, as well having Willow in her life, Tara muses that Lilah (a human) "wasn't a good person". In other words, Lilah has a conscience to guide her actions, actively chooses to follow a murky path (ie working at Wolfram and Hart/etc.). With this in mind, Willow (a demon) is definitely not "good", but I found interesting the distinction she makes with Willow as a being that didn't choose to become a demon (ie Willow was "made" a vampire).



The return of shades of grey was fascinating. In relation to working for the Mayor, before she could rationalize her job "as a means to an end" (ie in order to destroy the Master). But, now knowing she has a life-time to live, she must make a change (leave her job), before the darkness she feared by her "demon heritage", leads her to darkness as a human. Also fascinating in relation to her relationship with Willow (ie "area between life and death"). Having a relationship with a demon (with all that entails), Tara isn't truly "living". In the past just being with Willow might of been enough, but now knowing she has a "real" future, the stagnant way they are can't lead to true happiness (ie again wearing her pendant because her conscience is letting her down, for the guilt of all the innocents, Willow will kill in her life-time).



Lastly, I found fascinating how Tara ponders if she truly is human, because of the prophecy. She knows deep down they were destined to be together, but it was interesting how she wondered if it was this version of Willow (as a demon). Meaning, Willow as a vampire, can't fulfill Tara in the long-run, thus lead to true happiness. Therefore, with Tara still wondering if she is a demon, the "confrontation" to prove or disprove this notion was intense. To see Willow turning her back to Tara (although guarded, Willow did show trust on her behalf), Tara asking for Willow to taste her blood, and finally Willow answering her question with "Mine". With this in mind, Tara may know she is human, but what she is doing with her life (personal and professional) isn't right, which makes me curious to how she changes her life to make it right (ie to "truly live").

Edited by: VampNo12  at: 7/9/02 12:06:15 pm

[IsayAmberBensonsgorgeous]

wow, this update was truly great. the pace is perfect, every word is deliberate and fits in the bigger picture just as it should and it's amazing how you play with us, making Tara 'offer' herself in that way out of sheer desperation to her vampire was the stroke of a genius. i was more than shocked how the scene ended - shocked because i had no idea that THIS was coming. it's mind-boggleing - i'm still trying to wrap my mind around it.

thank you.

C

"Es ist fuer einen Menschen unertraeglich, ertragen zu werden." (Jean Cocteau)

[Zahir al Daoud]

Okay for the record--and for what feels like the thousandth time (each one more justified than the last)--this is a great story. And one reason (among many) is that the characters, although different, remain also the same as those we know. Tara is the wonderful lady we know, a lady far more bereft than in our world and so with many differences--and yet she is Tara. (And is it any wonder Lilah fell for her?)



Same with Willow and Faith and Giles, etc. I am so impressed.

"O Let my name be in the Book of Love!
If it be there I care not of that other Book above.
Strike it out! Or write it in anew, but
Let my name be in the Book of Love!"
--Omar Kayam

[zero]

Now *that* was good!

Actually, every part of this story has been amazing, and I'm thoroughly enjoying it. Thanks.

'Winners never quit, and quitters never win, but those who never win and never quit are idiots!'

[Katharyn]

Well thanks gals and guys,



VampNo12 - Don't feel you have to write these mini-essays, though they are great for reviewing where we are (I am about 10 parts ahead of you all in redraft so I forget!)



Now you can see far more levels than I intentionally planned to put in there... channeling I tell you! Aaah and how does Tara change her life? Well perhaps... just mayeb... someone changes it for her? Or not...



ISABIG - I enjoy it when peopel sat they are surprised as that is one thing that a writer never gets with their own fic's plot. Thankyou!



Zahir - Characterisation... very tricky. I am never totally happy with character as I write them in the normal "Buffyverse" here is easier and harder.



Easier because they can be different, harder because though they can be different you still have to believe in the differences and the processes that took them there. If that is working then great!



Zero - thankyou...



In fact thankyou all, it has been a long road and there is still about a quarter of this left part-wise.



Katharyn

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[Sassette]

Oooh ... Katharyn, this rocked, as always *G*



The whole idea that the fact that Tara ISN'T a demon STILL changes things is completely awesome - because it makes so much sense. The demon thing was almost a safety-net ... it allowed Tara to avoid things that she can't avoid now - she's staring straight at them, and it's awesome.



And holy monkeys, I >so< thought Tara was going to stake Willow.



I mean, on one level, I knew she wouldn't, because that kind of detracts from the whole W/T happy ending possibilities ... but I wasn't completely sure, y'know? Contingencies ... Wolfram and Hart have contingencies ... for awhile there, I really thought she might do it.



God, that was good *G*



And you know what? With Tara's inner-monologue, I almost wanted her to. In fact, I >did< want her to ... I wanted her to stake that 'thing' that wasn't the Willow she was supposed to have - to force Fate to find another way... but then VW turned her back, and Gosh ... I completely changed my mind with that one gesture.



This is SO very awesome *G*



-Sass

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I Think The Hellmouth Tastes Like Chicken -- Autumn

[Katharyn]

Hey Sass - Glad you enjoyed it.



The not being a demon thing was significant to me simply because of how Tara changed after Family. It was easy to imagine that there were things about herslef that she didn't think she could change until that episode, then it seemed obvious that this universe should be no different.



I was also sort of worried about whether anyone would believe that Tara was going to stake Willow... I mean it was there but that doesn;t mean that it was believable. Glad that it got you*S*



And if you wanted Tara to stake Willow then HURRAH! Got someone there... away from appreciating VW...



Just kidding but it makes the necessary easier.



Thanks



Katharyn

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[VampNo12]

It's funny when I start out I usually intend to briefly give feedback, but somewhere between brief I find long-winded ! What's also funny is that I am in law school, and we do case briefs (basically a summary of a particular case), and my professors always point out that a brief actually means being brief. One of these days I am going to try to implement this idea.



Katharyn I am also curious how many parts are left of this amazing journey? I remember you mentioned it before, but I forgot. Just trying to figure-out where the whole VW to W might be in this story, in order for W&T to find true happiness.

Edited by: VampNo12  at: 7/10/02 12:21:45 am

[wizpup]

VampNo12 - just a quick answer to your question, as it's nice to see one I can answer *s*



To the best of my knowledge, Katharyn is aiming for an end point at around 80 parts. At current posting rate, that means this wonderful epic will see you through the summer to early September.



After that - who knows? Katharyn is such a feedback junkie that pressure for a sequel may just pay off!



jo x

[Bobos Mom]

Katharyn,

I've become a lurker of late, but I wanted to jump back into the fray to tell you how impressed I am with the last update. I loved reading the exposition of Tara's internal logic, and I too thought the logical thing would have been to stake VW, and hope for the fates to step in. But the heart knows its own, and love is not logical, is it?



You're writing some beautiful, meaningful stuff here. I look forward to continuing the journey...

BM

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TARA: Willow and I always know how to find each other!

ANYA: With yoga?

[Katharyn]

VampNo12 - As you may have noticed from the fic I too suffer from brief not being brief... Why use a thousand words when 5000 will do?



Jo is right... Part 80 would be ideal as it is a round number. That might creep up a little as there are new idea slipping in for stuff that should be there. One I get that finished and redrafted the posting speed may creep back up... at the moment I am balancing the time I need to write and redraft with giving kittens a regular fix. Better every three days than one a day for a week and then 1 every two weeks eh?



Jo - I am a feedback whore.. .I admit it but sequel??? Aaaah! Anyway you should know something about what comes next!



Bobo's Mom - Thanks muchly. All I would say to your comment is this... you say logical to stake and hope for fate? Well yeah... However she has to believe W&H first... and until Willow confirmed it then Tara could not believe anything, including about fate. Even now can she believe everything? Do you?



Thanks...



Katharyn

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[Tulipp]

Oh, Katharyn. Every time I think I am figuring things out, you come along and say something like

Quote:

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Even now can she believe anything? Do you?

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and I realize that no, no I can't. I can only wait and read and be surprised.

[Katharyn]

Tulipp, allow me just to say:



"Mwahahahahah"



There I feel much better.



Katharyn

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[Tulipp]

You feel better?



Well, I'm glad *you* do....

[Katharyn]

Actually I have a headache... going to bed early I think... so though I got the evil laugh out of the way I am going to stop staring at the evil PC...



Take care all!



Katharyn

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[Tulipp]

Feel better, sweet dreams. I have (checks watch) 3 hours and 49 minutes to go at my PC until work is over.

[wizpup]

Ok - so the sequel thing was a tease - what? I can't have any fun?



And as for what comes next, it's a leetle bit early to tease about that isn't it?



Hope your headache's a gonna.

jo x